Shuck and Jive

Opinions expressed here are my own and do not represent the views of the congregation I joyfully serve. But my congregation loves me!

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Second Amen-ment

This article was in the Faith section of today's Johnson City Press.
SMITHFIELD, N.C. — Vickie Jordan and her husband, Eddie, were all set to open a gun store in Smithfield, but they were missing one thing: the name. “I went to bed one night and was real apprehensive because we couldn’t come up with a name,” Vickie Jordan recalled.

When she finally got to sleep, she said, she dreamed that God told her to name it after the Second Amendment — the constitutional right to bear arms — but to call it the Second Amen-ment Gun Shop.
“I said, ‘All right, Lord, I get the picture’,” Vickie Jordan said.

The name fit well: Her husband is an evangelist and pastor of Faith Baptist Church in Selma. And when he’s not preaching, he can be found at the shooting range with his son, Blake, who manages the new store.


“A lot of people make fun of me — a Bible in one hand, a .44 in the other,” Eddie Jordan said. “I sort of turned a hobby into a business.” The Second Amen-ment Gun Store opened last month and is among the few places in Johnston County to buy a handgun.

Walmart sells guns for hunting, the Jordans said, but the big retailer doesn’t have handguns, which have proven popular with
customers seeking a weapon for target practice or protection.

Second Amen-ment also has a full line of shotguns, rifles and sights for hunting, and the Jordans are planning to get turkey guns in time for turkey hunting season. The store also sells ammunition and can do special orders as well as legal transfers of weapons purchased online.
“We want to make it a one-stop shop for all hunters and shooters,” Eddie Jordan said.

He hopes to attract the large number of people who obtain concealed-carry permits from the Johnston County Sheriff’s Office.
Eddie Jordan said he wants to send his son to gunsmithing school so the business can offer repairs as well as sales. In the long term, he envisions opening a shooting range.
It is obvious that true believers need more guns. When your superstitions are not convincing on their own, people need a little persuasion. Amen?

8 comments:

  1. What would Jesus shoot? ;)

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  2. Don't know what he would shoot, but he would shoot damn straight.

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  3. What was it Gandhi said? I like your Jesus. It's his followers that frighten me? Lord help us.

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  4. I think Miss Music Nerd opened up a whole theologiocal can o' worms. Not only must we ask "what " would Jesus shoot, but we must also ask "who" he would shoot, "why" he would shoot them, and "where" he would shoot them. To the question of "what" he would shoot them with I think I can answer with some measure of confidence that he would choose a Berreta M9. It is my own first choice of handguns, as it is for the U.S. military, and I think it would suit Jesus just fine, as well. The questions of "who" and "why" are not as easily answered and are probably better left to professional theologians, or at least seminarians, to wrestle with. Now, where he would shoot them would have to be addressed on a case by case basis. No doubt some would be shot smack between the eyes and, Lord knows, they would deserve it. Others would be shot in the arm or leg and would recover fully once they repented. Still others would be only grazed by the bullet receiving mere flesh wounds that required no medical attention. Those would be the lucky ones. I'm pretty sure if I were to be shot by Jesus that I would fall into the last category, but who is to say?

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  5. Ah yes. To paraphrase: when your God shoots the same people in the same places and with the same weapons that you shoot, it's a sure sign he's created in your image, and not the other way around.

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  6. I think somebody should open up a store right next to that one that sells bullet-proof vests and Bibles, along with liberal scholars' work such as Crossan, Borg, Fox, Armstrong, et al. You can call it "The Whole Armour of God."

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